The Worst Sex Ever?

I am interrupting the regularly scheduled blog regarding my first dates post-the Cuban to write about my most recent fella.

The Ginger as he shall be annointed is an associate producer for a video game company, fairly recently divorced after 13 years of marriage, but was with the ex really from high school going forward. He's a midwestern transplant to the City. While ordinarily I am not attracted to gingers or to shorter guys (he's only about 5'7") I figured why not and accepted his invitation for dinner. We had made plans to go to Monk's Kettle on a Tuesday evening, but when we arrived it was about an hour wait. The thought of standing with a basic total stranger for an hour AND then eating a meal was a bit much to handle. So instead we walked up Valencia, and ended up at Fritz which is a Belgian style fries place. We had beer, fries, and shared a sandwich, it was a good time. We laughed a lot, had a lot in common, he was cute. I did not feel an instant chemistry or anything, but I had fun. At the end of the meal we decided to head across the street for a cocktail at the Elbo Room. One cocktail turned into two and before I knew it it was 2am. He walked me to my car, we hugged and said farewell. The next day he sent an email with the whole I had a great time....blah, blah, blah.

I decided that even though I did not know whether I was terribly interested in him a romantic way it was worth a second day. My schedule (both social and professional) has been full so it took us a bit to work out a time we could meet but a Sunday evening worked for us both. It would be post an board game meet-up I was going to (hey distractionbike if you're reading!) I ended up having a great time at the meet-up, and the ginger suggested we change the restuarant which is in the Castro because it was Hardly Strictly AND the Castro Street Fair. He suggested a place in Noe Valley which happened to be within walking of where I was so I agreed! We met for dinner, again had a lovely meal, great conversation, went to post dinner drinks (there was some smooching) and then we walked to my car and I gave him a ride home.

Despite the smooches, I think I was still a bit unsure where I was at. I know that I had fun, he was a good kisser, cute, kind, funny, thought I was cute and funny, etc...we were chatting everyday etc, and I certainly found myself liking him more and more. The following week I was checking out harpygirl and hte boy with the guitar at a cafe in Bernal and decided I would hit Ocean Beach afterward. The weather has been simply dreamy in the City. I was chatting with the ginger and mentioned it and he said he wanted ot join me, would meet me at cafe. I was happy, so surely that means I like him! He met me round 10, we drove to beach sat, chatted, smooched, did some star gazing all seemed to be going well. We made plans for Saturday night, a picnic or something.

Saturday I drove back from Sacramento, hurriedly showered etc, and we made plans for him to come to my place and we would head out to watch the sunset (cliche I know, but also a classic, its a cliche for a reason people!). He made it over and we were off, went out to Sutro Baths watched sunset, had burmese at a place on Clement (Pagan) and then back to my place. Opened a fantastic bottle of wine (gary farrell pinot) and then there were lot of smooches. Which led from one thing to another, which brings me to the title of this post.

Seriously it was awful, worse than high school. It lasted less than a minute, no technique, argh! Unfortunately its a deal breaker for me. Now I get he is not super experienced what with the long term marriage etc, but really??? I am hoping its been awhile or something....something....anything! So now its a little awkward because obviously he was aware that it was a less than stellar performance. He spent the night which was nice to be cuddled etc, but well, not sure what to do now. I think I will see him again, and maybe give things another go, but I am far less clear on where I stand now. Sighs. After this I think I may be due a little break from the dating bonanza which I have been engaged.

Argh. I guess the whole you have to kiss a lot of frogs addage reins true.